Maybe he hadn’t thought about children when the older man started dating his sweet, young girlfriend, but now it seems that is all she talks about. He knows he has no plans on being a father (or a dad again) and he thought he had made that clear when the couple talked about having a baby one day, but not anytime soon. What to do?
Reiterate your stance.
Apparently there was some miscommunication or the young woman heard only what she wanted to hear about having a baby one day. A man who is adamant about not having children will never say, “maybe…I guess…Let me think about it…” Instead he will keep saying things like, “No…Having a child is not what I want…I have no plans of having children this year, next year, or any years!” The more a man says the kind of things just to appease a woman, the more he will incur all kinds of problems with her in the future. Say what you mean, and mean what you say!
Stop having sex.
When a selfish or crazed woman is determined to bring a child into the world with someone she believes she loves, she will not stop at anything to make sure that it happens. It is best for a man who doesn’t want children to stop having sex with this type. Many men have continued to have sex with women only to feel trapped later. These manipulative women may have obsessed over having a baby whether openly or discreetly only to bring children into the world that the fathers simply didn’t love or want and were never that interested in the mothers from the start.
Ask for some space.
When it is obvious that your conversing with the young woman is getting you nowhere, ask or tell her that you need some time to think about the future of the relationship. Be clear that her pressuring you into having a child is not good or healthy for you or the relationship.
During your free time “…to think,” busy yourself with activities you enjoy apart from her, but not on dating other women. You will need this time to focus on whether continuing to be in a relationship with this future mother-to-be is what you truly want. When you find yourself really enjoying your alone time, think of how much this would change if you were suddenly given the news, “We are pregnant.” Would your mind change about being a father because you want to or because you have to be?
When you find the young woman is more concerned about being a parent than being a contented partner, move on. Too often couples make the mistake of staying together despite the elephant in the room, so to speak, that is often ignored. Don’t let lust, gifts, and travel, keep you from knowing what you want and don’t want at this time in your life.